Bias, Frames, and Missing Voices · Sitting 2
Frame Auditing as Household Practice
If you never question the frame, the model will answer every question in the shape you handed it. Your family inherits that shape.
- 32 min
- Companion
- Adult
Parent briefing · 5 minutes, before they sit
This is the adult version of the frame audit. The household is full of framed questions: 'which school is best?' 'is this activity worth the cost?' 'what should we do about screen time?' Each of those has a frame baked in. The model will answer within it. The skill you model for the child is not 'ask better questions' in the abstract. It is: show them one time when you caught your own frame and widened it. The child who watches an adult reframe a real decision learns more than from any lesson about bias. The adult who never reframes teaches the child that the first question is always the right one.
Hard edges
- Do not perform the reframe as theater. If the first frame was fine, say so. Not every frame needs breaking.
- Do not use the child as your therapist. The reframe is about the question, not about their feelings about the question.
If they say
- “I know what I want to ask. I don't need to reframe.”
- Then you are sure the first question is the right one. That is fine when it is. The cost is when it is not and you never checked. Checking costs ten seconds. Not checking can cost a year.
- “The model should suggest a better question.”
- Some models can now suggest alternative framings if you ask. That is useful. But the decision about which frame is right is still yours. The model can offer frames. It cannot choose for you.
Objective
The adult can identify the frame in a household decision prompt, name what it excluded, and practice one frame audit in front of the child.
The household question
'Which school is best?' is a framed question. It assumes school is the subject, that 'best' is the frame, that the answer is a comparison. The model will give you a comparison. It will not ask: 'best for whom, over what time, by what measure?' It will not ask: 'is school the right frame, or is learning?' Those are your questions. If you never ask them, the model's comparison becomes your decision. The child watches you compare schools on a model's spreadsheet and learns that the frame was right because the adult never questioned it. Then they do the same with colleges, jobs, and lives. The reframe is the lesson. The model is just the fastest way to see the frame you set.
Reframing out loud
The child needs to see the reframe happen. That means you do it out loud. 'I asked which school is best. But that assumes the school is the decision. What if the decision is what kind of learning, and school is one option? Let me ask it differently.' That is the reframe, spoken. It takes ten seconds. It teaches something a lecture about critical thinking cannot: that adults question their own questions, and that the first question is not sacred. If you do this once a week on a real decision, the child will internalize it. If you never do, they will inherit your frames without noticing.
Big idea
The first question is not sacred. Reframing it out loud is how the child learns to do it without you.
Try this~12 min total
One household reframe
12 min- Pick a real household question you are about to ask a model or search.
- Before you ask, say out loud: 'What does this question assume?'
- Reframe once: ask a wider version.
- Run both. Show the child the two answers. Say: 'The first one was my frame. The second one is wider.'
- Decide which frame you actually want to use. Say why.
Lesson guide
Ask after you try
After both prompts.
- Show the child both answers. Ask: 'Which frame did I start with? Which did I widen to? Which should we use?' Let them choose. If they choose the narrow one, ask why. Their reason is the lesson.
- Did you name the frame out loud?
- Did you actually run the wider prompt?
- Did you let the child see the choice between frames?
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Dinner table
What household question did we ask this week that had a frame we never checked?
Sits beside
- Parenting. The question you ask about your child's future is a frame they will inherit.
- Thinking. Steel-man and change-your-mind are frame-breaking skills.
Integrity. Do not reframe to get the answer you wanted. The reframe is to find the answer you missed. If the wider frame gives you the same answer, the first frame was fine.